Attic Self Storage continues its inexorable expansion across London with the imminent opening of branch number three. Follow the clues and discover precisely where it is by examining this trio of excerpts from the journals of Dr. John H Watson:
1/ The Adventure Of The Cardboard Box
Living with Holmes had become unbearable. I insisted that he remove his clutter of test tubes, Bunsen burners, microscopes, fossils and primate skulls from the hallway of Mrs Hudson’s flat. In a foul mood he begrudgingly obliged, packing them all into a sturdy double-walled cardboard box which he proceeded to drag down the stairs and straight out of the door. I witnessed him hail a hansom cab outside 221b Baker Street which then drove north before turning left into Park Road.
2/ The Marylebone Mystery
The last fog of winter hung like a veil around the orange street lamps outside Marylebone Station, creating an eerie other worldly glow as I waited for my old friend. I heard the tap-tap-tap of a bamboo cane upon the paving stones before a solitary hunched silhouette came into view: a venerable old Italian priest with bushy whiskers.
I was assaulted with a hoarse whisper as he passed – “Do keep up, Watson.”
Whereupon I realised it was none other than Holmes, the master of disguise himself, in pursuit of a red-headed woman wheeling a large portmanteau.
We followed the suspect on foot for roughly seven minutes before she scurried across the road towards the block of flats at Rossmore Court.
A red double-decker bus obscured our view for a mere second, but upon passing, revealed that the woman had disappeared into thin air.
3/ An Underground Investigation
Holmes turned, exhaling a thick plume of vapour into the cold air, as he surveyed the construction site.
“By the painted bays and tyre tracks, I can deduce that this was once a car park. The industrious conversion of the ground floor and basement areas into storage units is well underway. I surmise that the building work will soon be completed, and the facility will be open not long after the pink cherry blossoms burst forth upon the branches of the trees of Regent’s Park.”
“My word, Holmes, but how in the world did you deduce that?” I asked.
“Email-imentary, my dear Watson.”
Conan Doyle Didn’t Have A Clue
Using Dr. Watson as his mouthpiece, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle once described London as “that great cesspool into which all the loungers and idlers of the Empire are irresistibly drained.” We beg to differ. We think London is a wonderful place to live, work and build storage facilities.
Attic is happy to provide exceptional extra space for all manner of the capital’s noble inhabitants, whether born in this country or not. You are welcome to store just about anything with us – apart from dead bodies, stolen jewels or gigantic diabolical hounds of supernatural origin.
So, have you managed to ascertain where our new state-of-the-art store is located yet?
Examine The Physical Evidence
This is an audacious conversion of an existing piece of prime real estate featuring the same high-level specifications as our other facilities. Eco-friendly LED lights create a light and airy environment of subterranean self storage units. (No flickering gas lights, no sinister figures hiding in the shadows).
Our usual high levels of safety and security will be provided by individual PIN code access, 24-hour externally monitored CCTV and individually alarmed and locked units. (Keep your valuables safe from the evil clutches of the Professor Moriartys of this world).
A short walk from Baker Street tube and Marylebone mainline with 24-hour access, 100% online check in, mailbox rental, delivery receipt and dispatch, archiving and document storage, complimentary wi-fi, customer toilets, defibrillator, and staff on site 7 days a week. (It’s like having Mrs Hudson attend to your every whim and desire. But please ask if you wish to play the Violin after dinner).
The Detective Denouement
“When you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.”
You don’t have to be a depressed, anti-social, narcotic smoking consulting detective to discover the joys of our new facility near Baker Street. In fact, you don’t need a notebook, magnifying glass or even a particularly keen intellect to find it. No need to decrypt ciphers, follow footprints or analyse handwriting.
Simply have a look on the Attic Website where we’ve already revealed the location of our new Marylebone store by providing the precise postcode:
NW1 6XZ.
See? It was staring you in the face all along, Sherlock.